Ask and Ye Shall Receive

Ask and Ye Shall Receive.
~God, I’m sure

Note to self: taunting the Adversary probably isn’t a good idea.  Huzzy just e-mailed to let me know that the Navy is saying they did, indeed, overpay us by $1900.  So not only do we not get any money back and this check gone, but we aren’t going to get the hardship check Friday to help us out and we’ll lose $800 on the next check, which is almost as much as what we lost this one.

Screw you, Adversary, because I’m still not straying from God.  But you know what? You do suck big, hairy monkey er, things.

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Dear Toe and Dear Adversary

What saves a man is to take a step.  Then another step.  It is always the same step, but you have to take it.
~Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, Wind, Sand and Stars, 1939 (translated)

Dear Toe,
I know I haven’t pampered you my whole life. When I was young, I’d run around barefoot all the time. Now, my job requires me to wear heels most days and I’m sure that isn’t very comfortable for you. And I don’t give you pedicures like many other women do for their toes.

But you see, I have this… thing.  I hate people touching you. Think of it as me wanting you all for myself and not allowing others to touch you. Well, except for Huzzy when I allow a rare foot massage.

But that doesn’t mean that you get to rebel and make me to go to 98,754 doctors appointments and to go see a podiatrist. You may not know it, but a podiatrist is someone who specializes in touching feet.  My worst nightmare.

It’s been 6 weeks, Toe. Six weeks since you found a random carpet staple. Six weeks of antibiotics (and now we have to begin our 5th round of it). Six weeks of wrapping and unwrapping you twice a day. You made me limp during my first drill weekend. And now, you’ll be making me feel like a putz for this drill weekend when I can’t participate in PT again.

And, Toe… do you realize what the doctor is talking about when he’s talking about numbing you up and doing the “cookie cutter” procedure if you don’t get better by the time we return from our vacation?  He wants to stick a long needle in you. Then he wants to take a KNIFE or something and cut part of you out.

Do you realize what that will be like, Toe? How painful? Crutches? Stitches? Yeah, you think about that before you rebel again. In fact, why don’t you shape up now and make that thing go away so that we don’t even have to get to that point.

Thanks in advance for your help,
Wifey, who is tired of this

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Dear Adversary,
I’ve finally figured out why things have been going so wrong in my life.  Apparently, you’ve decided to visit me. It took me a while to figure that out. It took me until I was sitting on the floor in front of the toilet throwing up because of all the stress and because the randomly leaky toilet was my last straw. I was sitting there bawling because I didn’t know how much longer I could take everything and finally I called out to God for His strength to get me through this, because I know that’s the only way I can do it.

And it was then that it struck me. I know I don’t attend church anymore (but have already had one picked out in Washington that I want to visit), but that doesn’t mean I don’t believe in God. And I do know the story of Job inside and out.  I realized I was being tested by you just like Job was.

Now, my flocks haven’t been destroyed by lightning, my beasts of burden haven’t been carried away by plundering tribes, my servants haven’t been put to the sword (okay, I don’t have servants, but still), and no mighty wind has killed my seven sons and three daughters.

But I realize I am being tested. And I realize that the toilet deciding to randomly start leaking horrible amounts of water while I was just trying to get the house ready for sale was another test on top of the bajillion we are already dealing with.

And I understand that it’s you, Adversary, who is doing this. God is allowing you to test me, just like he allowed you to test Job, but I also know that He is there with me, just like He was with Job.

So bring it on, Adversary. You aren’t going to get me to turn from God and you aren’t going to break me. No matter what. And no matter what, God will have my back. So there.

And in the words of my youth: nanny-nanny-boo-boo… plleeebbbt (as I stick my tongue out)!

You might as well give up because I’m not,
Wifey


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The Dawn of Understanding and Stupid Mistakes

Money is the root of all evil… and man needs roots!
~Unknown

Well, we now know why we are being docked the money.  Or at least have a base understanding.  Are you ready to hear what might be the biggest cluster @*#$ of the year?

Looks like my husband isn’t married.  Or at least, not in the Navy’s eye.  Or rather, he isn’t in the pay side, but he is on the DEERS side.

Apparently, when Huzzy checked into his command, someone forgot to pass on the copy of our marriage license that Huzzy gave them.  And since, in truth, he had been married for two months at the time, he claimed married on the PCS move.   So when they decided he “wasn’t married” because there was no proof of it, they decided to take that money back.

But that’s not all.

Since he just started the other month actually getting married BAH, they decided they needed to take that back too. Since he wasn’t married, you see.

Oh, but wait.

It seems as though the farther the Yeoman looked into why his pay was screwed up, the more he found out how much MORE screwed up it was.

Apparently, besides being “single,” he apparently is living in the barracks (in reality, he’s not!) so they have been taking nearly $300 out of his paycheck for galley food expenses. Also, they still haven’t paid us back the $300-$500 of travel claims that he submitted in June.  And there may be more that is screwed up, but the YN couldn’t figure it all out in one sitting.

So when Huzzy asked for a breakdown of everything that was wrong with his paycheck and what the Navy was going to owe us, the YN said that it was so screwed up that he couldn’t even give him an answer at the time.

Suffice to say, nothing is our fault.  This is a total cluster you-know-what on the Navy’s part. The YN also told Huzzy that if we could get a copy of our marriage license by Monday that we might be able to get a “hardship” check of the back BAH (and what they took back on the last paycheck of BAH that they shouldn’t have) by next Friday. He said the rest would be given to us on the 1st.  Now, the back BAH still won’t be what Huzzy’s normal check is, but it will at least help.

And it helps to know that we will see the money eventually even though it will totally make us miss bills this month. And not only that, but we will be getting MORE THAN our normal paychecks due to all the back BAH, the money they’ve been taking out for his “living in the barracks expenses” and travel claims. Money that we never expected or knew was coming.

Do I dare hope… could this be… is our luck starting to change?

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Friday Funny #8

If I don’t laugh, I just might cry.
~Anonymous (or me, but I’m assuming I heard it somewhere)

This has been such a horrible, horrible week and the only things that are getting me through is that I get to see Huzzy next Wednesday and I planned a super-special, totally-awesome surprise trip for him on Saturday the 29th thanks to my mom… this is both of our Christmas presents since Huzzy won’t be here for the holidays this year.  He doesn’t read my blog (not because I haven’t given him the link before, but because he lost the link several times, forgets and just doesn’t seem to care to, which is fine with me) so I could tell you all here. But I haven’t decided if I want to make YOU ALL wait in suspense. What do you think?

But, because of the horrible week, I decided that I definitely need to do a Friday Funny.  Please join me with the “Friday Funny” meme. It can be anything from a comment that made you laugh or a funny story or even a funny photo/video you have seen.  Leave a comment if you post one and I’ll visit your blog to see!

This week’s Friday Funny is posters/photos that make me laugh.  Enjoy!

Drink Coffee, Do stupid things faster with more energy

Drink Coffee, Do stupid things faster with more energy

Oh, I'm sorry. You must be confusing me with the maid we don't have.

Oh, I'm sorry. You must be confusing me with the maid we don't have.

"Normal" is just as etting on a washing machine.

"Normal" is just as etting on a washing machine.

It's been lovely but I have to scream now.

It's been lovely but I have to scream now.

Start every day with a smile and get it over with.

Start every day with a smile and get it over with.

"Stressed" is "Desserts" spelled backwards.

"Stressed" is "Desserts" spelled backwards.

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Guess What! The Bad Luck Streak…

Bad is never good until worse happens.
~Danish Proverb

Woo-hoo… that bad luck streak I talked about in my last post?   Well…

…it just got worse.

Huzzy called me last night after finally being able to access MyPay. Apparently it’s not $800-$1,000 that is coming out… it’s $1,100.  Pretty much his entire base pay for the paycheck.

<Announcer> And that’s not all, folks.  Tell them what else they’ve won!

<Show Host> Well, for being such good patriotic citizens who both serve their country, who work four jobs between them and who are newlyweds that have seen each other for less than half their marriage and are about to go through their first deployment, we have an extra special treat for them.  They get… to have the same amount taken out of their NEXT paycheck.

<Crowd> *Intense clapping and cheering*

<Announcer> Congratulations to the newlywed couple. We hope you’ll enjoy this treat for years to come.

Aren’t we just so special?  I feel so… so… honored.  Yes, that’s the word.  Apparently The Powers That Be (whether that’s God or the Navy) have decided that we are so incredibly strong and so ready to take on anything, that we can be given just this one more thing to handle.  Yeah, honored.

I’m waiting to hear from Huzzy tonight. He’s going to talk to the Yeoman today and see what’s up since it’s the middle of the month and he can’t see his LES to see what’s going on. However, we figured out that this is exactly half of what they gave us for our final payment for the PCS (okay, not really, supposedly they still owe us $300-$500 for travel claims according to Huzzy) in June. You know, a week before they told us “oops, we overpaid you $800 and we need that back by the end of the month or we’ll garnish your wages.” That stuff we paid by the end of the month.

So there are two options:

  1. They shouldn’t have paid us anything in June and even though we asked them about it and they said we hadn’t been paid everything, they were wrong and are now yanking it (which begs the question… what about that $800 we already paid… do we get that back or is that on top of the $2,200?).
  2. They erred and we should get it all back since we were entitled to that. Which means we might be lucky to receive it by Christmas… the one I might be spending alone for the first time in my life with no family near me. Hopefully I’ll make friends by then and they’ll take pity on me and invite me over at least the day before or the day after Christmas.

Of course, there’s always the Navy’s option of Option #3… none of the above and nothing we can understand.

Dear God and Mr. Navy Wo/Man in the Sky… I’ve had enough, thank you. I’m strong and can do things on my own. I’ve proven it. Can I please have a break?  Pretty please?  Just a little one?

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