Warning: Humor may be hazardous to your illness.
Yeah, I know, three posts in one week, plus my two MFF. Deal with it
So I was on Facebook tonight and one of my friends (E) commented on my status. She was a reporter at the local TV station in Michigan and I worked with her quite a bit until she moved to Arizona. One of the last times I saw her (if not THE last time) was when we were opening a new section of our museum, which included new rides (yes, a museum with awesome rides!).
As the public relations manager, I was the one to meet reporters at 0400 when they came to do morning live shots (okay, I had to be there between 0330 and 0345 to open the place). My CEO would usually join us because he was always interested in media coverage. Anyway, since it was so early in the morning, we obviously didn’t have guests for them to shoot video of so E went on the rides and did her morning reporting while doing them. Until it came to a ride that she needed a second person on.
This ride looks like a big hamster ball. It’s basically a gyroscope for those who know what it is. It will twist and turn and go one way and then another. You really have to have two people on it or the one person ends up spinning wildly (more wildly than normal) on it. My CEO turned to me and said, “You go on it with her.”
I probably looked like a deer in the headlights because I incredulously replied, “Uh, you realize I get sick on spinny rides, right?” He laughed it off and said I’d be fine. So I got strapped in. And when I say strapped in, I mean hair tied back, ankles strapped down, wrists strapped down… the whole she-bang. I looked over at E and warned her that these type of rides and I don’t go well together. She laughed and said to let her know if I needed to stop the ride but the cameras were only going to roll for 10 seconds.
So the camera starts rolling (did I mention this is LIVE TV?) and E does her intro about the museum opening the new section and the ride starts spinning. Upside-down. Left. Right. Violently. As my face goes whipping by, I can see that the camera is still rolling.
Ten seconds goes by. Still rolling… just like my stomach is starting to.
Fifteen seconds go by. It’s creeping up my esophagus.
Twenty seconds go by. I start telling E it’s about time to stop this (thinking the cameras had stopped by now).
Twenty-five seconds go by. I’m urgently telling E it’s time to stop.
Thirty seconds go by… the camera drops down and E says “okay, we’re done.”
And the ride stops.
My head and stomach are still spinning.
I get off the ride and my CEO takes one look at me and immediately starts asking if I was okay (must have looked pretty pale/sick!). He asks if I need a washcloth for my face/forehead. Insists I sit down. I must have really looked bad. I just said softly, “I told you I don’t do spinny rides.”
I look up at E and ask her why we were on the ride so long. She laughs and says the producers were having fun watching the two of us and were hoping one of us would throw up. My jaw dropped. I asked her if the cameras were rolling the whole time. She said yes. I swallow and then ask if it was live the whole time. She said yes.
I groaned and dropped my head and asked if they were able to hear me telling her we needed to quit NOW. She said the producers could hear it and were laughing, but the television audience couldn’t hear it.
So yeah. I was THISCLOSE to becoming a YouTube sensation of yacking on camera fame.
But what brought all this up? Like I said, my friend E commented a Facebook status and I responded and jokingly told her, “By the way, I’ve ALMOST forgiven you for making me nearly puke on air. Well, you and the producers who thought it was funny and kept the segment going longer than planned .”
“You made my resume tape with that one . “