Category Archives: Grrrr
So Ready to be DONE
Sometimes, when one person is missing, the whole world seems depopulated.
~Lamartine
Probably time for a real post. I’ve just been pretty… I guess a good word for it is… despondent. And I’m sorry, but this post might be a bit melancholy. But that’s how I’ve been feeling lately and this blog is about, well, the ups and downs of being a military wife. This is a down. But there are definitely ups.
I did write the post about being thankful my husband is deployed. And that is still true. But it doesn’t make it easy. And if our time apart was only normal, I’d be fine. It’s just that this last month of the 20 months from HELL is killing me. Seriously… living together for just six weeks in a 20 month period is no fun (and that wasn’t even six weeks all at once!). Now, we’ve had about eight weeks total together in that time frame, but that was two weeks of vacation and we were sleeping in a room of someone’s house. That wasn’t living together.
Our second anniversary is coming up in just a few months. And I was excited that we were going to be able to spend it together. Until I got an email from Huzzy yesterday (woo-hoo for the first email since before Thanksgiving!) and he told me that on his short time between this deployment and the next one in the spring, he’s going to be sent to a school for a month in San Diego or Hawaii.
I have no idea when that would be as he didn’t tell me. But I can guess what when that would be (warning: pessimism coming out)… my guess is it will be end of February to the end of March. You know, just in time for us to move into the house we are going to buy and our March 21 anniversary. That would be the worst time for us since I’d have to move us entirely by myself and we’d not have our anniversary together. So that’s my guess.
Sure, let’s just throw in separation during our anniversary. In 2010, so far we’ve missed New Year’s, my birthday, 4th of July and the entire holiday season coming up. That’s, of course, not counting the exact same holidays that were missed in 2009 (except New Year’s 2009, we were together for that). We know we won’t be together for my birthday and it’s scheduled for us to be apart for the exact same holidays next year. So why not? Let’s take away the only other celebration we have during 2011. That would be three years in a row of NO celebrations except for our 1st anniversary in March 2010, which I’m eternally grateful to have had together.
Three years. ONE celebration. NO holidays. Not even Easter.
I’m about done with this and ready to have him home. I was looking forward to having him for a few months but now with the school, that’ll be a few months minus one. Not to mention that their homecoming has been moved to the right TWICE in the last week.
I am lucky that I have an awesome friend here in Washington. I am actually starting to consider her my best friend. She relies on me a lot to help out (her husband is on our previous boat and they are currently gone too) because she has a 2 year old and a 2 1/2 month old. I love spending time with them. Just today, she called and asked me to help her take them to get photographs taken. I have no idea how she would have done it without the extra set of hands.
But it’s not all about me helping her. She calls me to make sure I’m okay and has invited me to Christmas with her. We also just talk. Talk like girls sometimes need to talk. I’d be so lost without her right now. We mutually lean on each other. If one stepped to the side, I fear we’d both fall down.
Brrr… update & MilSpouse Friday Fill-In
51 hours & counting without any power. I can now see my breath inside.
Unca Sam, our red, white & blue Betta, did not survive last night’s cold temps.
MilSpouse Friday Fill-In is on hiatus this week so you all can spend time with families and not miss anything.
Happy Thanksgiving!
-Wifey
Brrr
Power. Out. 28 hours and counting.
Iced hill. Can’t drive out.
15 outside. Single digits later tonight.
Almost in the 30s INSIDE now.
Washington = cold
Michigan = 60 and warm.
Me = confuzzled by this.
Ice cold soup = disgusting.
Cantalope + pita chips = lunch
Bread + 2 mini candy bars = dinner.
No breakfast.
Cold pups. Cold me.
Can’t feel fingers.
Phone dying.
Catch ya on the warm side.
-Wifey
Here we go again…
The sudden disappointment of a hope leaves a scar which the ultimate fulfillment of that hope never entirely removes.
~Thomas Hardy
This past Tuesday.
As of Today.
So yeah. If you are following me on Twitter, you know the gut-punch I received Wednesday night. Those who have been following my blog know how little Huzzy and I have been together since we were married in March of 2009.
We were together for our first seven weeks. Then Huzzy PCSed to Washington state and I was left in Michigan to try and sell our house. I was there for 1o months alone. I was able to see him for about three weekends and one two-week vacation stint. Also during this time, we endured our first deployment, which included no communication for seven weeks… over Christmas and Thanksgiving, no less!
Huzzy helped me PCS to Washington about two months after he returned from that deployment. Five weeks later, he left on his second. When he returned from that one this past July, we had 12 days together before I left for the Defense Information School (where I am currently).
And here’s where it gets fun… we were supposed to be together for a few weeks before he went out on a short several-week deployment. We were supposed to have Thanksgiving and Christmas together. Then, I was supposed to have him for FOUR WHOLE MONTHS.
Until Wednesday.
Huzzy has been switched to a different boat. It’s actually a different platform, though one he was on for nearly six years before he met me. They needed more people in his rate/rating (MOS) since they only had one. It’s a good move for him… he’ll get to be a Leading Petty Officer (LPO) at sea, which is a wicket that needs to be checked before would be able to become Chief or go LDO (officer). It’s really, really good for him.
But this new boat? It leaves for a deployment in a few weeks. As in… before I graduate from my school. As in… before I return home. There goes the holidays. He’ll return late this year/early next year. I was really looking forward to spending time with him… not coming home to an empty house again. It’s just very, very depressing. Especially since I have my own year-long deployment that will probably happen next year looming over me. And really, going from very little red in the “Donut of Misery” to nearly half red is very disheartening.
I just… need to stop wanting to see my husband. That will make it easier. I’m kidding–well, about the not wanting to see my husband. The other is quite correct.
Anyway, as I type, I am 39,000 feet in the air (yay in-flight wi-fi) just coming across South Dakota (according to Flight Aware) heading back to Fort Meade, MD. Even though we really couldn’t afford it, Huzzy and I decided after the news Wednesday night that we needed to see each other at least for three days. So it was nice to see him (though I’m returning more stressed than I was before–possibly a post on that in the future) but “see ya laters” are just become waaaaay too normal and don’t get any easier.
*sigh*
Semper Gumby, ya’ll… Semper Gumby.
Internet Problems
Hey folks… I’m here at Fort Meade for my two months of training. Unfortunately, the good ol’ Army can’t spring for Internet that can support WordPress. (I’m doing this from my phone) In fact, due to NSA being on base, I don’t get good phone reception, either!
I hope to have a real post up as soon as I can get to a place with better Internet.
