Category Archives: Life
Serious Musings
There’s something in every atheist, itching to believe, and something in every believer, itching to doubt.
~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic’s Notebook, 1966
This will be a bit different than most of my “real” postings. Now that I’m no longer doing MilSpouse Friday Fill-Ins each week, I have more time to do actual blogging.
This might become a heated debate. If it does, I’m expecting that my fantastic readers will maintain civility, even if there are opposing views. I expect that no one will attack anyone else or say negative things about other views. Differing, CIVIL opinions are welcome.
Let me preface this by saying I’m a Christian. I was brought up in a Protestant (Methodist) church and 100% believe in God. I’ve had enough things happen to me that just can’t be explained by anything except God. However, I don’t believe in pushing it down other people’s throats. I think each person is free to choose the religion–or choose not to believe in a religion–that they wish.
I’ve just recently been going back to church regularly for the first time in a while as an adult. Though I’m Christian, I believe the Bible was created and translated by humans. Meaning, there are probably errors in it, but that the general theme of a loving God, Jesus, salvation, persevering during trials and tribulations, Heaven and Hell are true.
But I have things that I believe that make people say I can’t be a true Christian. And things that make me question myself.
I 100% believe in letting those who are gay, lesbian, bi-sexual and transsexual marry whomever they want. Seriously, what is wrong with love when it is two consenting adults? Is love really that bad, in whatever form? Frankly, I think the world needs MORE love!
Yet, this past week at church, the pastor told us his thoughts on Washington’s then-upcoming law (which, as of today, is law). He encouraged the congregation (without actually saying it) to sign the petition that will temporarily repeal it and put it on the upcoming ballot so the voters can then vote it down. He stated that there are six sexual sins of the Bible and God hates each equally: incest, bestiality, homosexuality, adultery, sex before marriage and one other than I’m not remembering at this moment.
He then said he’s looking into the legal ways they can prevent “those kind of events” happening in the church. This is where I have the issue… if God hates all sexual sins equally, then shouldn’t the church also prevent anyone who has had premarital sex or had an affair from having a wedding at the church? Is the church going to welcome GLBT’s into the congregation? If not, then why should anyone who has had premarital sex or an affair be allowed into the church? I mean… if all sexual sins are equal in God’s eyes… then why should ANYONE judge which sin is worse and which one will be discriminated against? What about “let ye who is without sin cast the first stone?”
And while I’m on this topic, we were talking about making marriages strong at the same service. He was talking about The Five Love Languages and was giving the example that his is affirmation. He said he’s vain and loves his wife to tell him he’s the best husband, man, lover, etc. Wait a minute… isn’t vanity (pride) one of the Seven Deadly Sins? I’m a bit rusty on my Bible, but doesn’t it say somewhere in the Bible that God hates all sins equally? So, if homosexuality is a sin and so is vanity… who’s “more wrong?” And really… there’s no one in this entire world that is without sin. So where does that leave us? Why does a church choose one “sin” to rail against?
Now, I can see the argument that marriage is something that is biblical in nature and therefore meant for a man and a woman. But if using that logic, ONLY a member of the clergy should be able to marry you. If you are “married” by a judge, captain of a ship, etc… it should be a civil union. And if the church wants to preserve the sanctity of marriage as only for one man and one woman, I can maybe be okay with that. BUT ONLY IF CIVIL UNIONS RECEIVE THE SAME LEGAL RIGHTS THAT MARRIAGE DOES. Because, if marriage between one man and one woman is based on biblical teachings and it’s those who follow the teachings to the letter, then what in the WORLD is anyone other than a pastor/reverend/member of the clergy doing marrying people? (by the way, don’t tell our family, but Huzzy and I were married legally 15 days before our wedding in the courthouse… which, under this logic would be a civil union.. and I’m fine with that).
Also, if marriage is based on the Bible, then why does that give anyone legal rights? Aren’t we supposed to have separation of church and state? Isn’t that the foundation of our country?
Wouldn’t it stop a lot of the “marriage is for one man and one woman” and “the gays are ruining the meaning of marriage” <insert eye roll from me here> if MARRIAGE was a church ceremony, but a civil union was what everyone had to have in order to be given the legalities provided by the state/federal governments, including insurance and legal rights? Then the church could keep marriage to one man and one woman… without infringing on the rights of others.
I’m not arguing one way or another. I really am struggling with these questions. I will never change my stance that two consenting adults who are legally able to make their own decisions should be able to be with whomever they want and get the same legal protections as anyone else. But I’m trying to figure out why we focus on certain things in the Bible and emphasize certain things.
I would think that if the church is against homosexuality and wants to make it (or keep it) so that it is against the law… shouldn’t they also be pushing for adultery and pre-marital sex to also be the law?
Does anyone have any way to clear this up for me? You will not change my views on being a Christian. I am one. You will not also change my views on gay rights. But what I’m looking for… is explanations. I’m horribly confused. Other than the above, I really do love the church.
And the job came back, the very next day…
Everything happens for a reason.
~My mom
If you remember, I had another opportunity last April and was selected as one of the most highly qualified. I didn’t get the job due to someone taking it in a lateral transfer. But I had met the supervisor while I was volunteering at the airport helping military families coming home after being displaced by the tsunami. We seemed to click well enough. He’s been getting my resume from several different people he and I both know, including me sending it to him when I came to the area almost two years ago.
Then in November, right after I was laid off, a community relations job opened up in the Navy too, with the same supervisor. It was perfect for me. Like it was written for me. So I applied. And waited because I felt this was exactly what was meant to happen. The supervisor seemed eager to know I was applying.
But I didn’t get it. Heck, my resume didn’t even make it to the supervisor. I wasn’t sure why, but I figured I just hadn’t figured out the new system the Navy uses to screen resumes (USAjobs). I had CHART down but the new system might have been looking for something different.
So I agreed to do the three month active duty Navy thing that I’m doing right now.
Today, my CAPT walked in and looked at me and said, “You need to call XX because I just heard from the admiral this morning that that position opened back up again.” <side note: the CAPT knew about the job because if I had got it, I couldn’t have done the three months active duty for him>
So I called the (hopefully future) supervisor and he said he was glad to hear from me. He told me the person they had hired had quit three days before she even started the job. So he said the job was open again and said he didn’t see my resume the first time around. I told him I did apply but hadn’t made it through the automatic computer screener.
He then told me that he has no idea why it didn’t make it through except that maybe the other people had more eligibilities. I told him I had the VRA but that my military spouse preference had expired in May. He said he was going to be opening the position wider but that he was limited in what he could open it to due to it being a term position. He then said that he doesn’t know of anyone else who has the resume I do for this position. He offered to meet with me and let me ask him any questions I might have. We have to do it soon because once the position opens, he can’t really talk to or help any candidates or potential candidates. So we have a meeting in a few weeks to chat. I’m definitely looking forward to it.
I do have a job interview on Friday. It’s a great job and may just be local (instead of Seattle) but I’m not sure. Their website says they have offices in Portland and Seattle, but the CAPT (yup, same one as above) told me about the position and seemed to think they had an office locally. That would be AWESOME. This job pays decent money and is more sales and member relations. While I can certainly do sales and am good at it, I’m more interested in the member relations part. I’m excited to hear more about this position.
When it comes down to it, I just want to work for a company that is solid, dependable (read: won’t lay me off after just a few weeks so they can rent a building in another state) and one that appreciates me for my skills and one I can wholly get behind and enjoy coming into work each day.
I still have more than two months left of active duty but it’s getting to the point where I need to start getting job interviews if I’m to have a job by the time April 1st rolls around and I’m no longer on active duty. It takes a while to go through interviews, then second interviews and then the offer. I still have time, but in another three weeks or so, if I don’t have progress, I’ll start panicking a little bit!
Bring on 2012!
Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each New Year find you a better person.
~Benjamin Franklin
This past year has been a tumultuous year of ups and downs. But I’ll admit, it was mostly downs. I’m ready to see what 2012 brings and am really looking forward to the year! Here’s a recap of the year for the Wuzzy Household:
No, I'm not that short, he's just super tall. I'm 5'5".
January saw the return of Huzzy on New Year’s Day and my first dependent’s cruise. At this point, we had been married for nearly two years but only spent 14 weeks together… and not all of it at once! In fact, we’d only spent seven weeks together at one time.
February was the month we were supposed to move into our new house, but delays with our banks started and were really frustrating us.
March gave us just a hint of what was to come… our nearly 12 year old Greyhound, Chase, had to be sent to the Rainbow Bridge after what we can only guess was cancer of some sort… most likely throat. But it was the traumatizing injury that happened while he was at the vet’s that took him sooner than expected.
April was the worst month in the Wuzzy household. The second week of the month, Huzzy’s dad had a massive heart attack and never regained consciousness. Huzzy was able to fly cross country in time to make it to the hospital in order to be there with his brother while they made the heartbreaking decision to take their dad off life support. He was gone for the rest of the month. The same day we got the call about his dad, we moved into our first home purchased together. That bright point was hard to see at the time but we recognize it now and cherish our home. Because of his loss, Huzzy was unable to go on his boat’s spring/summer deployment (though he was supposed to pick it up part way through but due to the boat’s change in schedule, that never happened). My cat our family got in 7th grade died (at my mom’s house). It was his time, but it was still sad.
Chase just six months before he died.
May was spent pretty much alone as Huzzy was gone for all but a few days of it taking care of his dad’s estate. We realized our former landlords were not going to give us our deposit money back nor even acknowledge that we existed. I also learned I was probably going to need surgery on my shoulder. It was this month that I also was promoted to LTjg and we started fostering kittens for the local humane society.
June started and ended crappy but the middle was a pretty good because my mom came to visit and Huzzy was here for my birthday for the first time in our marriage. Of course, he made it with only 10 minutes to spare, but technically, he made it. Before either of them got here, one of our first foster kittens ended up biting me down to the bone in my finger (it was a feral kitten I was taming) and I had to go to the ER. Good news? That kitten is now a fantastically friendly kitten who apparently got a great home! Right after that, my mom had to put our childhood dog down. She had cancer. And the end of June saw yet more death… my cat, Sadie, that my mom was keeping at her house and that I was going to bring home in 2012 died.
July was probably one of the best months of the year, even though it started off with the death of someone who was like a grandfather to me. I finally, after 16 months, got a job. I also spent my two weeks AT on the USS Nimitz, which, even though it was in drydock, was fantastic. Huzzy and I spent Independence Day together, which was only our second holiday together as a married couple.
Kissy and Skully, mid-fight, leaning against Lulu on our bed.
August started out with court mediation with our former landlords. That didn’t bring any resolution so a court date in front of a judge was set but the earliest one was five months away. The month also brought news that I was definitely having shoulder surgery and ended with bringing our third set of foster kittens home… these ones just 10 days old (with momma). We ended up keeping two of them and naming them Kissy and Skully.
September was fun because my brother came out to visit. I hadn’t seen him in nearly two years and he had never been west of the Mississippi.
October saw me transferred to a new Navy Reserve unit… one that I’m really excited about working with for the next three years. It also was the month I had my shoulder surgery. Huzzy also left to go on a short patrol (not with his crew) to get some qualifications done.
November was the month I met my new unit… but two days before that, I was laid off from my job. Huzzy also came back juuust in time for us to spend our first Thanksgiving together in one place since we were married. We spent it with friends and some Single Sailors from his command.
December also brought two more deaths… someone that was like a grandmother to me (yes, the wife of man who died in July) and my great-aunt, whom I had met only once. But it bought us yet another holiday together… Christmas. It was nice to spend it together and not be alone. However, he has 24hr duty from 8 a.m. New Year’s Eve through 8 a.m. New Year’s Day, so we’ll have to wait until our fourth NYE married before we have a chance of ringing in the New Year together… if he doesn’t have duty then! We also found out our landlords filed for bankruptcy, so the court has canceled our court date and we will probably never get our money back. A$$hats.
So while we’ve had some great times this year… it has been overshadowed by way too much death. I’m so ready for 2012 and hope it brings happiness, healing (both physical and emotional) and LIFE.
