She stood in the storm. And when the wind did not blow her way–and it surely has not–she adjusted her sails.
~Elizabeth Edwards
Friday is Military Spouse Appreciation Day. In honor of this, I will be hosting a linkup that day for all military spouses.
If you’d like to join, please write a post introducing yourself on Friday and come back and link up to Mr. Linky (similar to MilSpouse Friday Fill-ins). I hope we all get to know a few more bloggers through this process!
We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today.
~Stacia Tauscher
It’s Month of the Military Child and this week, I have a guest post from the fabulous Stacy of Raising Chaos. She’s the wife to Mr. Chaos and they’ve been married for six years. She’s also the mother to three incredibly adorable kids… Little Miss, Little Man, and Baby Chaos. They’ve been through five deployments together and are about to go through number six. After you read her post here, please make sure you stop over at her blog and check it out. And without further ado, here’s her post:
April. Month of the military child. It took me a long time to figure out what to write for this post. There are so many aspects of the military and many children don’t understand, at least not until they are older. I realized that I have no idea what my children think of their Dad being in the military. I had no idea if they even knew what it meant to be a military family, to be a military child. So I asked one of them. Since my oldest is 6, I thought it would be interesting to see exactly what she thought of her Daddy’s job. So I sat her down with a list of questions and asked away.
Me-So Little Miss. You know that we’re a military family, meaning your Dad serves as a member of the military.
The three adorable Chaos Children.
Little Miss- Yes. Dad’s in the Army right?
Me-That’s right. What do you think your Daddy does in the military?
Little Miss-Well, I think he has to practice a lot.
Me-Practice what?
Little Miss- He has to practice getting the bad guys for when he has real missions. He has to learn so he can protect people.
Me-Do you like when he has to go do his real missions (aka deployments)?
Little Miss- No because then I don’t get to see him for a long time.
Me-What do you miss most while he’s gone?
Little Miss-I miss playing with him and him tucking me in to bed and saying goodnight. And I don’t like that you are sad more often when he’s gone.
I had more questions but my daughter, my 6 year old, had put tears in my eyes. It was all I could do not to cry. Not to hug her. Not to tell her that she won’t have to deal with Mommy being said while her Daddy’s gone anymore.
When our husbands deploy or go on training missions or schools we think about how our home life will change. I have to think about the kid’s schedules and figure out how to do everything on my own without getting physically and mentally drained. When he’s gone, I have to think about who’s going to help me make all the phone calls to random strangers about who knows what (I hate talking on the phone to random strangers) and I have to figure out how to step out of my comfort zone. But most of all, when he’s gone, I have to figure out how it’s going to affect each of my children because no two children react the same to him being gone.
I have always felt that when he leaves for his deployments I have been the strong one, the one to help my children through but I realize, while watching my children play in the sandbox, that they are the strong ones. They are the ones that get me through each and every deployment. Without them, I’d be lost. Without their laughter and love and innocence, I would be lost.
My children are the strong ones. My children are the ones who hug me when they see me crying because I haven’t talked to my husband that day. My children are the ones that make me laugh when the internet connection was spotty and I couldn’t understand a word my husband was saying. My children are the ones who get me through the bad times and who make those bad times good. My children are my strength. My children are warriors just like their Daddy. My children, my military children are everything to me and are the strongest little warriors I have ever known.
Now that you’ve read her awesome blog post, go check her out at Raising Chaos!
I wrote this last year, but it’s worth re-posting. Or at least, I think it is.
The Twelve Subbie Days of Christmas
On the first day of Christmas, my subbie gave to me:
A seabag of clothes smelling of amine!
On the second day of Christmas, my subbie gave to me:
Two phone calls from topside,
And a seabag of clothes smelling of amine (ew!)!
On the third day of Christmas, my subbie gave to me:
Three strains of boat crud,
Two phone calls from topside (shhh, don’t tell),
And a seabag of clothes smelling of amine!
On the fourth day of Christmas, my subbie gave to me:
Four missed holidays,
Three strains of boat crud (*cough* thanks, hubby),
Two phone calls from topside,
And a seabag of clothes smelling of amine!
On the fifth day of Christmas, my subbie gave to me:
Fiiiiive emails at once!
Four missed holidays (yes my birthday counts),
Three strains of boat crud,
Two phone calls from topside,
And a seabag of clothes smelling of amine!
On the sixth day of Christmas, my subbie gave to me:
Six days of duty…
Fiiiiive emails at once! (Boy did I need that!)
Four missed holidays,
Three strains of boat crud,
Two phone calls from topside,
And a seabag of clothes smelling of amine!
On the seventh day of Christmas, my subbie gave to me:
Seven days to pay the rec bill
Six days of duty (New Year’s Eve, again?)…
Fiiiiive emails at once! (finally!)
Four missed holidays,
Three strains of boat crud,
Two phone calls from topside,
And a seabag of clothes smelling of amine!
On the eighth day of Christmas, my subbie gave to me:
Eight Single Sailors at dinner,
Seven days to pay the rec bill (WHAT did he spend it on?),
Six days of duty…
Fiiiiive emails at once! (finally!)
Four missed holidays,
Three strains of boat crud,
Two phone calls from topside,
And a seabag of clothes smelling of amine!
On the ninth day of Christmas, my subbie gave to me:
Nine different duty stations! …
Eight Single Sailors at dinner (how much do they eat?),
Seven days to pay the rec bill,
Six days of duty…
Fiiiiive emails at once! (finally!)
Four missed holidays,
Three strains of boat crud,
Two phone calls from topside,
And a seabag of clothes smelling of amine!
On the 10th day of Christmas, my subbie gave to me:
10 weeks ‘til the next deployment…
Nine different duty stations (I don’t even know where I am!),
Eight Single Sailors at dinner,
Seven days to pay the rec bill,
Six days of duty…
Fiiiiive emails at once! (finally!)
Four missed holidays,
Three strains of boat crud,
Two phone calls from topside,
And a seabag of clothes smelling of amine!
On the 11th day of Christmas, my subbie gave to me:
11 still-unpacked boxes!…
10 weeks ‘til the next deployment (yikes, already?),
Nine different duty stations,
Eight Single Sailors at dinner,
Seven days to pay the rec bill,
Six days of duty…
Fiiiiive emails at once! (finally!)
Four missed holidays,
Three strains of boat crud,
Two phone calls from topside,
And a seabag of clothes smelling of amine!
On the 12th day of Christmas, my subbie gave to me:
A 12-hour plane ride to see family!…
11 still-unpacked boxes (from three moves ago!),
10 weeks ‘til the next deployment,
Nine different duty stations,
Eight Single Sailors at dinner,
Seven days to pay the rec bill,
Six days of duty…
Fiiiiive emails at once! (finally!)
Four missed holidays,
Three strains of boat crud,
Two phone calls from topside,
And a seabag of clothes smelling of amine!
Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.
~Robert Heinlein
I’m still here and still alive. I just finished up a marathon summer, which included six weeks of traveling. Because of this and Huzzy’s most recent deployment, we still haven’t spent more than two weeks together since Christmas. And he’sbeen home since April.
Kittens at three weeks old.
We’ve been dealing with some things lately. The number one issue is that for the past six months, we’ve been unsuccessful in trying to become pregnant. We’ve done everything right and even with my traveling, the timing has been perfect. But nothing. And that’s on top of the year (minus a total of 14 weeks Huzzy was deployed) of “not trying but not preventing.”
It’s been long enough that my doctor wants me to come in and she’s going to try and see what the problem is. Huzzy already had some tests done and it’s most definitely not him. So whatever it is is my problem. Hopefully we can fix it easily. That being said… does anyone know of an RE in the Kitsap area that you love/trust? I may need to find one.
Huzzy and I are also dealing with some personal things, so please pray/think good thoughts that things work out well.
On top of that, we have some absolutely adorable foster kittens. In fact, we have six of them and they are 6 1/2 weeks old. So freakin’ adorable. Momma just went back to the Humane Society yesterday… she stopped nursing the kittens and was getting tired of them. So it was time for her to focus on herself and get a home.
There is still no cure for the common birthday.
~John Glenn
Today, I realized that my 30th birthday is less than two weeks away. I’ve known that it was coming, but it hit me tonight. It’s the first birthday that I’m thinking of all the things I “thought” I’d have/be doing by it. I mean… 10 years ago, I thought I’d be married with two small children and visiting my family once every other month or so.
I’m married, and married to a fantastic guy. But we don’t have kids even though we would both love to have them right now. I don’t know if the road to to having children will be rocky or not. What I do know is that I’m 99% sure I had an early miscarriage last month (called a chemical pregnancy). And while in my brain, I know that something like 40-70% of first pregnancies end in miscarriage (though most are chemical pregnancies and a majority women don’t even know they are pregnant before they… aren’t), it’s still tough to deal with.
And it was happening as I was sitting on a plane and then going into work the next morning. How do you pretend that everything is okay when that is happening? Because it’s really hard to tell people, “pretty sure I was pregnant but didn’t even make it to the doctor to get confirmed.” It was also SO freakin’ early that it’s hard to even believe it might have been happening myself.
It’s also something that starts me worrying if this will be a long process. Because if we want to have two children (and we do!), if we don’t have them in the next five years or so, there’s a good chance that I won’t be able to have them thanks to some family history that will force a hysterectomy.
Anyway, I’m done talking about that. I wasn’t even going to post it but someone who I confided in said I shouldn’t have to go through it alone (though I wasn’t because Huzzy is here but it’s not the same). And I started thinking she was right. One of the reasons I started this blog was to share my life so that it might also help others. I’m sure some of you have gone though the same thing.
Other topic: Huzzy and I splurged this week! Tomorrow, we are getting new floors installed throughout the top floor of our house: our dining room, livingroom, hallway and the three upstairs bedrooms. We also bought a new couch! Unfortunately, the couch is on backorder and won’t get here until July, but still.
Oh gosh. I am old. We spend $10,000 on floors and furniture and I get excited and am extremely happy with the idea. My young self would have purchased a new car (coming later this year!) or gone on vacation or done something else with it. Furniture and floors? Yup, I’m old.
