Tag Archives: Navy

When the Navy Intrudes…

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Most of us, swimming against the tides of trouble the world knows nothing about, need only a bit of praise or encouragement – and we will make the goal. 
~Jerome Fleishman

Huzzy has been on shore duty for nine months now and because of this, I haven’t really had anything to say regarding the Navy. That’s why it’s mostly been about my infertility struggle. He’s been working and is usually home before I am and has only had to stay after five maybe three times in the entire time he’s been on shore duty. Sure, he has duty four times a month, but he only has to stay overnight two or three times a month.

Our fourth anniversary was this past Thursday (if you don’t know how we met, it’s hilarious–check it out here). Because it was on a Thursday, we decided three months ago to go out for our anniversary dinner on Friday.

You see, we normally go to the Sky City restaurant, which is the revolving restaurant at the top of the Seattle Space Needle. Well, actually we went there for our first anniversary and had reservations for our second, but Huzzy’s boat kept him at work too late for us to make it to the reservations. Last year, he was 20,000 leagues under the sea so we couldn’t go then.

Anyway, Huzzy came home Tuesday night and told me that he was warned Friday night would be a late night… as in, late enough that we wouldn’t make the 7 p.m. reservation that we had made three months ago.

This brought back all the memories of sea duty when we couldn’t plan anything even days in advance without assuming that it might not work out due to the boat schedule.  He ended up making it out on time due to something pushing work schedule back to next week.

Now, he might not be home until late Monday through Wednesday. I’m on CD12 today… I expect our IUI to be done sometime between CD15-CD18, with CD15 and CD16 being the most likely. That would be Tuesday or Wednesday. The same days he’s working late.

If it happens to fall on those days, there is only a small chance Huzzy can get out of work to go get the IUI done with me. Which means if we can’t have it done, taking the meds was pointless and we’ll have to wait until June to try again (due to my Navy Reserve physical readiness test that will make me have to stress my body and focus on getting ready for it, which isn’t good for TTC).

I am really hoping that the IUI falls on a day that is either one Huzzy doesn’t have to work late or one that he can get out of work for. I would be extremely upset if this happens. I mean, I know the Navy comes first, but it has come first for so many years that DARN IT, I just want our family to come first for once. He’s on shore duty, it’s supposed to give us a chance to have “us” time and for it the stresses of sea duty to be relieved.

Okay, enough complaining. It is what it is. The Navy is what it is. What will be will be. But that doesn’t stop me from wanting what I want and wishing for what I wish.

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The Biggest Honor

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Just do good, don’t worry about the road ahead.
~Monk Wansong

I don’t talk a whole lot about my job as an officer in the Navy Reserves. Frankly, that’s usually just a small part of my life. Being the wife of an active duty Sailor is what shapes my life. Huzzy’s patrol (deployment) schedule and the fact that we are here and nearly everything in our lives is touched by his service in the Navy. And as such, that’s what I tend to write about. I usually need the camaraderie and support of being a MilSpouse more than I need it in regards to my own service.

But that’s probably going to change once Huzzy heads to shore duty since he’ll be home each night (unless he has duty) and it will be a more regular schedule. Hopefully. I’m really, really hoping the hours aren’t like his last shore duty… recruiting. So when that happens, I will probably blog more about my job/life in the Navy Reserves.

I am truly honored to be able to serve my country in a small way. However, besides that, I’ve recently had the chance to do something that is truly an honor: re-enlisting and enlisting someone.

This started a month ago when I re-enlisted Huzzy. After that, I’ve enlisted two people into the Navy Reserves because there is a recruiting office on the 2nd deck of the building where I’m doing my three months of temporary active duty.

Let me tell you… enlisting or re-enlisting someone is SUCH an honor. Other than Huzzy, I was not the person’s choice… I was the officer the recruiter saw when they came downstairs looking for an enlisting officer. But regardless… it’s an honor because enlisting/re-enlisting into the Navy is a big decision. It’s something that will define a person’s life for the rest of their life, whether they are career military or in for just a few years.

Out of everything I’ve done so far, this part of being an officer is super-cool (yes, I’m a child of the 80s) and is very humbling.

Side note: When Huzzy re-enlisted, I may or may not have emphasized the part in the oath that says, “and obey the orders of ALL officers appointed over me.”  He also may or may not have sworn the oath with his hand on my pink Bible. There may or may not be photographic evidence. (which, if said evidence was around, wouldn’t be released until Huzzy saw the photos first).

Standing Up For Yourself

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The difference between perseverance and obstinacy is that one comes from a strong will, and the other from a strong won’t. 
~Henry Ward Beecher

I have a strong “will.” I am here two and a half weeks post-surgery typing with just one hand.

But you know what? I’m here because I stood up for myself and for what I knew I needed. Even when doctors didn’t believe me or thought they knew better.

Check out my latest SpouseBuzz post for details!

One-Armed Wonder and Other Musings

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I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once. 
~Jennifer Yane

It’s finally happening! I’m going to have surgery in exactly four weeks. While I’m scared and nervous, I’m also so excited. I sure hope this will finally fix my shoulder.

Unfortunately, the doctor isn’t sure what is wrong. My MRI came back fine, but he wasn’t expecting to find anything on it. He said labrum tears (which is what he’s expecting to find) are hard to see on MRI and because it’s been 18 months months since the injury, he said it would have been even more unusual to actually find something. He also says there is a possibility of me having stretched ligaments (like a rubber band that’s been stretched and won’t go back in place). If it’s the labrum tear, he’ll fix that by shaving off the flyaway pieces and, depending on the severity and type of tear, re-attach it. If it’s a stretched ligament, he will have to tighten it back up.

The doc has said the goal of the surgery is pain relief and the prognosis is “good to excellent.”  That’s good news for the most part. If all I get from this surgery is pain relief, I’ll be happy. He says there’s a good chance that I will have pain the rest of my life. There’s also a moderate chance that if the ligaments are fixed, they could be fixed too tight or too loose… and then I’d have to have surgery again.  And while he expects me to be back in Navy-shape six to 12 months after the surgery… there’s a chance this won’t happen. Which means I’d be medically separated.

But I’m focusing on the positive… I have a GOOD chance of lessening the pain after this surgery. I’m so excited about that. I’d love to sleep more than 3 or so hours without waking up and having to re-adjust my sleeping position. I’d LOVE to sleep on my left side again. I miss it. And my right shoulder gets tired of being the only one slept on.

According to the doctor, I will need care 24/7 for the first 10 days. After that, I should be able to return to work since I do office work. I’m going to have to rent an “ice machine.” Apparently, it’s a gizmo that is wrapped around the shoulder and delivers a continuous flow of cold water to keep the area iced and the swelling down.

Huzzy has told his command about the surgery but they haven’t given him the okay that he can take care of me for either that day or for the entire 10 days. And while I know I have friends in the area who wouldn’t mind shuttling me to the hospital for the surgery (while it’s total anesthesia, it’s a same-day hospital stay/surgery), I loathe to ask people to help. I will if I have to, don’t get me wrong, I just don’t really want to.

I’ll be in a sling for quite a while and I’ll still be in it when Huzzy goes on his next patrol (deployment). This should be our second-to-last one before shore duty. Four in 2 1/2 years so far. Pretty normal for our community except deployments 2 & 3 happened back-to-back and that’s what’s going to happen to deployments 4 & 5. That’s not normal but we’ll have been with three different commands during these five patrols, so it happens. The final deployment looks like it’ll be a long one (so far). Oh well, I know it will (or should) be our last, so once we get through this one, we are one away from being home free! Well, at least for a little bit.

As I go through my daily routines, I’ve been thinking about how that will be with a sling. And not just a sling, but I won’t be allowed to move, turn or lift my shoulder for fear of un-doing whatever fixing/tightening the doctor will do in there. I’ve wondered things like….

How in the WORLD do I get a shirt on?

Not to mention my Navy uniforms… how am I supposed to wear those and still be in regulations?

I drive a stick shift… uh…..

How do I put muzzles on the dogs?

How do I open a jar?

The bathroom. ‘Nuff said.

I am going to have to become a one-handed pecker. (get your mind out of the gutter, I’m talking a hunt-and-peck typist)

How do you pull a chord for the push-mower while holding down the bar thing on the handle?

I’m glad I don’t have kids and have to deal with them one-handed. But dealing with the dogs should be interesting.

 

This should be quite the adventure… and one I will hopefully not have to repeat. The Navy hasn’t given me an LOD (Line of Duty) letter yet, so right now, I’ll have take those 10 days off unpaid and also not be able to do my second job and lose the pay from THAT. The letter was supposed to be here a month ago. My choice is to either do the surgery now and hope they will eventually back-pay me or put it off… and have the surgery while Huzzy’s deployed.

Have any of you had labrum surgery and/or tightening of the ligaments/tendons? How did it go? Am I worrying about not having help afterward for no reason?

A Job, My Pain and the Navy… Oh My!

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Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America.  If I’m not there, I go to work. 
~Robert Orben

For my regular readers (those who don’t come here ONLY for MilSpouse Friday Fill-In) may have noticed that I haven’t written a real post in… oh, about a month. Of course, I still blog once or twice a month over at SpouseBuzz.Catch me over there, too!

On the job front.
I started my new, full-time job on July 25th. I’m working for a tech company and am creating and heading their public relations and marketing department. The hope is in the next 12-18 months that I’ll be hiring one or two people under me.

It’s less than 10 miles from our house (yay! no 3-4 hour roundtrip commute to Seattle!) and the pay is quite good, especially for this side of the sound. Hopefully, we’ll be able to pay off all our debts except the house and Huzzy’s truck within the next year. That would be SO nice!

I’m still doing the respite care approximately 16-20 hours a month and then, of course, my reserve duty. With all three jobs, I end up doing 18-20 day stretches with no day off. Quite the change from only working 2-7 days a MONTH that I’ve done since March 2010. But, again, it’ll be good to pay off bills. We are going to continue living on the same budget that we did when I was on unemployment, with one exception… we are going to get $100 each a month for “play” money to do whatever we want with it.

This is something I’d suggest for any couple to do: if you can afford it, give a set amount of money to each person each month. Each person can choose to do what they want with it and spend it on whatever they want. I’m a saver and will save the money and Huzzy is a spender and will spend it that month or the next month. He can buy MORE fishing gear or things for his motorcycles or whatever he wants and I have NO say in it as long as it comes from his personal money. Same goes for me. That way, there’s no arguing about “wasted” money from either side because… hey… that was their money to do what they want with.

Case-in-point: Earlier this year, Huzzy bought an Army trailer for $400 that he thought he could sell for $1,000 (since that’s what they were going for online). It’s still sitting in our yard. It hasn’t been sold. So while I can bemoan the fact that it’s taking up space in our yard, I have no reason to complain that we spent $400 on something and haven’t gotten our money back. That’s Huzzy’s problem because it’s his money.

I also started volunteering back in May as a kitten foster mom for the local humane society. To date, I’ve volunteered for 536 hours. I foster kittens and so kittens without moms the humane society says to log 10 hours a day and for kittens WITH moms (like the ones I have now), I log 8 hours a day. Woo-hoo! I love volunteering and there’s nothing better than coming home to cute, sweet kittens who make you laugh by their playful antics and then make you smile by the way they fall asleep in your arms.

On to my medical fun.
I saw an orthopedic surgeon in June at the Naval Hospital and he basically said he thought the radiologist report from my MRI in May was “overzealous” and that he wasn’t going to do anything with it (which, from talking to many medical type people… doesn’t happen. All orthos they’ve seen defer to the radiologist report). So he gave me a cortisone shot because he said all that was wrong with me was inflammation in my shoulder. Guess what? It didn’t work. Surprise, surprise. If it was that easy, my body would have fixed itself in the last 18 months.

So I went to a second opinion out in the civilian world. And that ortho wanted me to follow the radiologist report and get an MRI with dye contrast. He ALSO said I showed signs of neck problems and ordered an MRI for that (helloooo… I’ve been asking for that since the beginning, too!). My MRI was yesterday and we’ll see what the report says when I go back to ortho #2 next week for a reading. FYI… having dye injected into your shoulder joints is NOT pleasant. And it’s much worse after the procedure and the next day. Yay, fun. Hopefully this diagnoses it, though, but Ortho #2 said he doesn’t expect it to… he expects it to just rule things out.

I just need this thing fixed. Or the darn arm to just be cut off. One of the two would help. I wake up a minimum of 3-4 hours a night from the pain/discomfort and have to find another sleeping position. The only reason I haven’t been kicked out of the Navy for it yet is because it’s an injury that happened on Navy time. But there is still that possibility if this can’t get fixed or if it can’t get fixed well enough. Joy of joys.

On to Navy fun.
Huzzy was supposed to join his crew in the middle of their patrol (deployment). That never happened since the boat ended up having missions that prevented them from surfacing. So, in order to make up for that, he’ll be joining the opposite crew (non-fast attack subs have two crews) for THEIR patrol and then turning around and doing his own crew’s patrol after that.

So, yeah… between now and next May when Huzzy gets off sea duty and on to shore duty… not going to see him more than a couple of months total. And not all at once. Par for the course, I guess since this will be our third set of holidays married and I still have yet to spend a Thanksgiving or Christmas with him. We did end up spending the 4th of July with each other and that day, combined with ONE Easter in the 2 ½ years that we’ve been married, constitutes the entirety of our total holidays spent together since we were married.

So that’s where I am right now. Three days into a 19 day stretch with no days off from work (since this weekend is drill weekend) and loving being back in the working world and making money to get this family out of all debt. I have come to HATE debt of all kinds, though I can see the need for mortgages and SHORT car loans (I will never have more than a 3 year car loan again and want to get to the point of being able to pay outright for a car).