Hey you… yeah you! I know you. I see you casting a longing eye at the cooing baby while curling your lips into a smile that doesn’t quite reach your eyes. I see you look away to hide the longing and the hurt. I see you in the OBGYN’s office sitting in the corning away from the pregnant bellies and the smiling new mothers… only to get a panicked look on your face when an obviously pregnant mom with a toddler sits down next to you.
I know you.
I see you.
I am you.
I used to think when we wanted to have children, all I’d have to do is go off birth control for a few months and BAM! Pregnant! Because, ya know, that’s the way my mom and my whole family has done it. But that, sadly, hasn’t been the case. I have the frustrating diagnosis of “unexplained” infertility. What that means is the doctors have no freakin’ clue why we can’t get pregnant. They can find no reason for it.
This is National Infertility Awareness Week (NIAW). With one in eight couples experiencing this disease called infertility (yes, it’s a DISEASE), there are a lot of us out there. Some of us are vocal about it, and some of us aren’t. It doesn’t matter if everyone knows your struggle or if you keep it to yourself—your struggle is still valid and just as daunting.
I started this blog as a chronicle of my life so that it might be able to help others going through what I am. I’m a writer at heart and until my infertility diagnosis, it was mostly about the struggles of being a military spouse. Now that my husband is no longer on sea duty (which he will return to next year), it’s more about my infertility struggle.
If you are interested in reading about my infertility timeline, you can check it out HERE.
If you’d like to see a round-up of posts from the last year, which included fertility medication, IUIs (intrauterine insemination), IVF (invitro fertilization), and a host of other medically fun things, check out THIS POST.
If you need something amusing, check out my 12 Infertile Days of Christmas post (yeah, I know it’s not the season but I think it’s still funny).
If you want to chat, or need someone to talk to, feel free to email me a wifeofasailor (at) gmail (dot) com.
If you don’t suffer from infertility and would like to know what you can say (and what not to say) to help someone you love, check out this Resolve post on 25 Things to Say (and Not Say) to Someone Living With Infertility.
If you would like to learn more about infertility, check out Resolve.org. I’d start with the following pages:
Infertility 101: http://www.resolve.org/infertility101